Never Seek a Relationship When You're Lonely

Never Seek a Relationship When You're Lonely

Written by Chris Josh

The worst time to look for a relationship is when you're feeling lonely. Why? Because you'll choose the wrong person almost 100% of the time. 

This is because you'll miss the red flags or simply disregard them altogether in order to lock the person down.

You'll also settle for the first person who shows you any interest.

It's a lot like grocery shopping on an empty, growling stomach. You almost always end up spending way more than you intended and you buy more junk food than you had liked to.

So what should you do? You should address your co-dependency issue:

  • Learn to love yourself more.
  • Establish a self-care routine if you haven't done so already.
  • Find a hobby or two.
  • Read 30 minutes a day. 
  • Meditate 15 minutes a day.
  • Recite your affirmations throughout the day.
  • Write down your goals.
  • Write down your manifestations.

Get in the habit of smiling on the inside and outside more. Look at yourself in the mirror and say to yourself, "I love you!"

It won't be long before you start to cherish your own company and that serene, beautiful peace.

Cease the seeking of a relationship altogether and watch how you eventually magnetize the right person who is going to respect and value you.

We've all been lonely at one point or another, including myself. And I made a HUGE mistake by getting into a terrible relationship all because I didn't want to be alone. I missed ALL the red flags. That's ok though. You live and you learn. 

Hopefully, you and I don't repeat any of our mistakes.

Has this happened to you? Have you ended up with a toxic person because you were eagerly looking for someone to keep you company? Let me know in the comments section.

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Frank Samosari

April 23, 2025
I was in a relationship with 5 kids she left me 8 months ago to another person currently she stayed with her brother everytime she calls me and wanted to argue with me all the time and I told her I haven't created this problem it's your decision to do so and instead your are arguing with me all the time you are the one who should apology to me for your wrong and you told your brothers to support you and continue to hate me and your brothers support you with your own problem I supposed to be the one who is angered for you but instead it's you who are causing this problem between us.
Therefore, my brother Chris can you help me find out about this and can I let go of this or can take her back bcos we have a child that still needing her mum? So I want an answer from you as soon as possible.
Thank you for your help and support me to return my wife or how can I get a new relationship with a new one?
I remain waiting for your advice ASAP.
Thank you
Cheers
Your active follower
Frank Samosari

Angela Brownlee

April 22, 2025
I remember when I consciously made the decision to keep my illusion of the toxic relationship. Had I been honest with myself I never would of stayed so long!

Mari Chapman

April 22, 2025
Not divorced yet. Only need spiritual companion and friends at this point. 10 commandments. I will learn my lessons. I would never rebound. I want to be friends first. When I'm free I will think about dating.

Marisa

February 11, 2025
❤️

Kim

January 30, 2025
Codependency is definitely something I struggle with. I never really knew I did until recently. It makes me feel empowered now to love myself more and to forgive myself and accept that I am dependent on other people to validate love for myself and getting out of a victim mentality.


Great post ! Thanks for sharing! Very blessed to be on a healing journey of self discovery. So happy so many people are sharing their personal struggles with the world.

Thanks Chris for your posts!

Vera

January 30, 2025
Thank you for the encouragement!

Naana Mettle

January 29, 2025
Thanks Chris everything you’ve said is true. God bless you .🙏🏾❤️

Sherry Serrano

October 29, 2024
Too much to discuss however point being
I’ve only had one person that after my accident showed me through showing me the “red flags” that I not only could still love and give the best of me .
However, I couldn’t keep up with his life constant validation of the people around him .
Had to be on point , pretty enough etc
About 4 months into the relationship he looked at me after I had sang to a lot of our friends ( we are in same town ) that he actually looked at me and said “ you know you are pretty” .
I was like WTH ?!
I kept it in .
I shortly broke up with him because it hit me so hard .
I’m not the same and I’m not just arm candy or someone that needs to find love in the wrong places.
It was up to me to do all the work . A person that truly loves you they will look for the things your lacking and they will accommodate . Both sides not just one . 🐬

Sherry Serrano

October 29, 2024
Too much to discuss however point being
I’ve only had one person that after my accident showed me through showing me the “red flags” that I not only could still love and give the best of me .
However, I couldn’t keep up with his life constant validation of the people around him .
Had to be on point , pretty enough etc
About 4 months into the relationship he looked at me after I had sang to a lot of our friends ( we are in same town ) that he actually looked at me and said “ you know you are pretty” .
I was like WTH ?!
I kept it in .
I shortly broke up with him because it hit me so hard .
I’m not the same and I’m not just arm candy or someone that needs to find love in the wrong places.
It was up to me to do all the work . A person that truly loves you they will look for the things your lacking and they will accommodate . Both sides not just one . 🐬

jill

October 29, 2024
maybe when i was younger.

Jesenia Foster

October 27, 2024
Thanks so much for this. This just confirms that I’m on the right track and things are getting better because today was a day where I applied so much self care to myself. But I forgot that I love you part. Sometimes I’m so focused on loving God that I forget to say I love you to myself. And I’m living in a time where so many people want me to hate myself, and reading your words sent me free from something that I didn’t even know was troubling me. God bless you greatly. And yeah, my standards are so different now. I’m a person that cares way too much for people and tends to pick people because I feel bad for them. I’m the person that always wants to help someone, but this time I’m going to choose someone that can help themself. Of course loving each other would just be an added bonus. Shalom!

Chosen

October 26, 2024
Spot on Chris. Thank you for all you do in supporting the healing process for many.

Kwetlong

October 26, 2024
As from last 2 yrs till now no relationship.

Oladeji

October 26, 2024
Hello Josh.

Thank you for the good job you are doing.

Glory be to God I made it to your comment section.

Thank you once again.

Pam G

October 26, 2024
Yes Chris Josh I learned my lesson, I spent many years in an abusive relationship. When I found Jesus, that’s when I woke up and found my worth! I found Jesus and I found myself.

Olga Crisu

October 26, 2024
Thank Chris!
You truly make a difference!

Olga Crisu

October 26, 2024
Thank Chris!
You truly make a difference!

Sharlene Sierra

October 25, 2024
You so right!

Mohamed Boulares

October 25, 2024
Hi Chris yes what you say is right I end up with bad relation ship because I been lonely and looking for any woman keep me company so I end up with 2 prostitu have sex with every one because our society good women are Muslim no do girlfriends and boyfriends so I’m stuck with them

Marilena Shirley

October 25, 2024
This is true, I did sabotage everything I was doing for God. I fell into the wrong person's arms that promised me forever with so many red flags. Thank you for this article.

Marilena Shirley

October 25, 2024
This is true, I did sabotage everything I was doing for God. I fell into the wrong person's arms that promised me forever with so many red flags. Thank you for this article.

Marilena Shirley

October 25, 2024
This is true, I did sabotage everything I was doing for God. I fell into the wrong person's arms that promised me forever with so many red flags. Thank you for this article.

Marilena Shirley

October 25, 2024
This is true, I did sabotage everything I was doing for God. I fell into the wrong person's arms that promised me forever with so many red flags. Thank you for this article.

Maryjane Fenner

October 25, 2024
Working on me! I’ve never felt better! ❤️

Maryjane Fenner

October 25, 2024
Working on me! I’ve never felt better! ❤️

MargaretHeaton

October 25, 2024
I feel so stupid i waslonely twice and ended up being through the most horrendous times,

Carla0714

October 25, 2024
Yes, I was with a narcissist. Met him thru as you say being lonely. Now loving myself and staying single doing things you stated in your article for me. 🙏🏾

Tracy-Jo

October 25, 2024
Short answer is yes I have. Been through too much to be in a hurry. I know who has my six and focus on Him.
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